I have to say.
I love my name.
The way it
rolls of my tongue
not just alone
but the combination
the first and the last
feels like dynamite
short bursts
like when you touch
your mouth to a battery
creating an electric spark
that bittersweet
taste
I have to say
I hate my name
when my mother yells at me
the obsessive repeating
the growing anger
when it morphs into
a monster
that sounds nothing like your name
and everything like
anger
annoyance
a wawawaw
piercing feedback
My name is rare
I hate to share it
to have someone
steals it's purpose
in my life
it's uniqueness
it's antiqueness
and it's smell
like an old wooden
cupboard
not like me
not expecting me
but somehow finding me
And nothing beats
the way the one you love
says
your name
especially for the first time
it's like hearing a note you've never heard before
seeing a color that doesn't exist
and all you want is for
them to say it
every
minute
of
every
day
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